my worst enemy

he was my best friend
practically with me since birth
we went through both good
and bad.
he went out of his way
to smile
to laugh
to cheer me on every morning
he would think up stories
about dragons
about pirates
about princes
to entertain me at night.
he'd comfort me with songs
he made up all by himself.
and when no one looked
we danced
like lovers
like youths
like there was no tomorrow.
everyone would only see this side
they didnt see how he hurt me
he would call me names
like stupid
like worthless
like scum
and he'd whisper when no one could
hear
he'd tease me often
about my face
about my body
about the words that came out of my mouth
and sometimes i find myself
realizing
he went out of his way
to smile
to laugh
to push me down whenever i did something
wrong.
no matter how many times
i looked in the mirror
no matter how many times
i said it was the last straw
that i would no longer
stand for it
that i would for once
stand up for myself
that when i did i wouldn't
ever stand down...
with punches of exaggerated lies
based on a small truth
i was beaten back down
and i could never defend myself
because it was true
every word he said
hit straigh at the heart
every memory he relived
made me want to cry
and whenever i make friends
he fills my head with lies
telling me that if i couldnt trust him
the who could i trust?
i made friendships based on him
and how he thought they would feel about me
i based my attire on what i thought
would make him like me
there would be times
when i stopped caring
but theyd be short lived
because he would tell me about
the stares he noticed
that i didnt
he was my best friend
practically together since birth
he is me
i am my own worst enemy

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i thought up a cool poem and wanted to post it but its two in the morning and im on my phone and i cant post anything in my gallery for some reason (heck posting it on a journal was a hassle in of itself) but yeah heres a poem i hope you like it (:

good night xoxoxo

and remember to donate any money if you can to the redcross organization or any other organization you think is worth helping (so long as youre sure said organization is a legit one)

na night again!!!!(: